Doc Ruger gets zombie watch duck

Doc Ruger and his "zombie watch duck"

Doc Ruger and his “zombie watch duck”

I have recently acquired an extremely rare “zombie watch duck” which are highly coveted by zombie hunters. Only about one out of 100,000 ducks have the necessary qualities to be a zombie watch duck. When a zombie approaches, to alert its owner, a watch duck will rapidly fly off the zombie hunter’s shoulder or poop.  If a horde approaches it will typically do both at the same time. It is rumored that a zombie hunter has never been surprised by a zombie if he/she has a watch duck on the shoulder. It is also rumored that zombie hunters that use watch ducks rarely get dates, because they all smell of duck poop. Watch ducks are extremely rare and not even mentioned in the Zombie Cause Dictionary, some even suggest that they are mythical, but I have the droppings on my shoulder to prove all the skeptics wrong.

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4 responses to “Doc Ruger gets zombie watch duck

  1. That’s a pretty serious duck.

  2. John Meisenheimer

    Makes sense to me.

  3. You are VERY LUCKY (No Pun intended) to find 1 of those Special Zombie ducks. My Congratulations to you!!! Now, can you please tell me how much you paid for it and where I can buy one? Thanks … P.S. I have heard from a reliable source that a really bad Zombie will be passing thru the Orlando area sometime before Oct.15th, so keep your duck close by, because a Zombie duck on your shoulder is worth 2 in the bush.

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